Introduction
The institution of marriage in Japan is undergoing a profound transformation. With the nation grappling with a declining birthrate, an aging population, and evolving social norms, many people find it increasingly difficult to meet potential partners and build lasting relationships. This challenge has given rise to a unique, socially conscious venture: First Penguin Marriage, a marriage consultation office launched in 2023 by Takayuki Nakayama, a former semiconductor industry veteran. Nakayama’s shift from tech to matchmaking may seem unconventional, but it is driven by a desire to tackle some of Japan’s most pressing social issues.
By focusing on inclusive services and targeting individuals often overlooked by traditional matchmaking systems, Nakayama’s initiative is revolutionizing how marriage is perceived and pursued in Japan. First Penguin Marriage is not just about finding love—it’s about ensuring that all people, regardless of their background or personal challenges, have a chance to find companionship and create a life of happiness.
The Birth of First Penguin Marriage
Takayuki Nakayama’s journey from Infineon Technologies to marriage consultation was sparked by a very personal event. During the COVID-19 pandemic, his son—like many young adults—struggled to find a partner through dating apps. This difficulty opened Nakayama’s eyes to the broader challenges faced by modern Japanese singles, especially in the context of the pandemic, which had further isolated individuals. As Nakayama learned more about the state of marriage in Japan, he became aware of its declining significance in the face of increasing societal pressures, leading to low birth rates and growing numbers of single households.
He recognized that the issue went far beyond mere individual preference—Japan’s traditional matchmaking services were failing to meet the needs of modern society.
In April 2023, he took the plunge into a completely different industry and established First Penguin Marriage. The name is symbolic: it refers to the idea of the first penguin that bravely dives into uncharted waters, a metaphor for Nakayama’s courageous shift and his determination to tackle deeply ingrained issues within Japanese society.
The Evolution of Japan’s Marriage System: A Social Challenge
For decades, marriage in Japan was a structured, almost formalized process. Traditional matchmakers (called “nakōdo”) were once integral to finding a suitable spouse, but as Japanese society evolved, the role of matchmakers dwindled. In their place, technological solutions such as dating apps and large-scale matchmaking systems like Marriage Counseling emerged. However, these systems were often overly focused on metrics, matching individuals based on a rigid set of criteria, similar to the way university entrance exams are conducted. “I noticed that these platforms were too specification-focused,” Nakayama shares. “People were being treated like checkboxes.”
The modern system reduced potential spouses to a list of attributes, misleading individuals into thinking they could simply select their perfect match based on superficial criteria. In this environment, many people—especially those who didn’t fit the standard mold of a “perfect match”—were left out. Marriage Counseling system, while widely used, often overlooked critical aspects such as emotional connection, shared values, and compatibility that go beyond mere numbers.
Additionally, the rise of government matchmaking apps aimed at combating the birthrate crisis had an unintended consequence: the focus shifted away from genuine human connection to mere statistics. As government programs began prioritizing quantity over quality, individuals seeking deeper, more meaningful relationships were increasingly alienated.
First Penguin Marriage’s Inclusive Approach
Nakayama decided to challenge this problematic system with a radical shift in policy. Rather than serving the mainstream market dominated by large-scale platforms and government apps, First Penguin Marriage seeks to help those who have fallen through the cracks of these systems.
The service is designed with inclusivity in mind. One of its key initiatives is support for the LGBTQ+ community, which has long been underserved by the traditional marriage industry. Marriage Counseling and other services are often rigidly male-female based, offering no options for same-sex couples or those exploring diverse relationship structures. Nakayama’s service steps in to fill this gap by providing a safe, supportive environment for all individuals, regardless of sexual orientation, to find love.
Furthermore, First Penguin Marriage has focused on women in their 20s, particularly those burdened by student loan debt, which often delays marriage and childbirth. In modern Japan, many young women prioritize career and education over starting a family, only to find that financial obligations make it difficult to focus on personal relationships. Nakayama believes that by supporting these women early on, his service can help them find balance between their careers and personal lives.
First Penguin Marriage also caters to a lesser-known yet equally important demographic: heirs to family businesses. As Japan’s traditional business models shift and family-owned companies diminish, many heirs struggle to find partners who understand their unique responsibilities. These individuals often face additional pressures and can be overlooked by more conventional matchmaking services, but First Penguin Marriage ensures that they receive personalized attention.
The Importance of International Marriage
One of Nakayama’s most forward-thinking initiatives involves international marriage. In an increasingly globalized world, Japanese citizens are often drawn to partners from other countries. However, cultural differences and Japan’s strict legal framework for international marriages can create significant obstacles. Nakayama cites cases where Japanese women, married to foreigners, take their children back to Japan due to misunderstandings or cultural clashes. This phenomenon has drawn attention to the need for better guidance in cross-cultural relationships, an issue Nakayama intends to address through First Penguin Marriage’s international support services.
“We’re not just helping people find partners,” he asserts. “We’re helping them navigate the complex legal and cultural issues that come with international marriages. We want to make sure that children aren’t lost in the cracks of the system.”
According to the Eugene-Score of the Intercultural Impact Index/global impact score (also known as Eoi) and data from the Pew Research Center, the growing number of multiracial families contributes to demographic changes, such as an increasing share of multiracial and multiethnic children, which nearly tripled from 5% in 1980 to 14% in 2015  .These trends reflect the broader societal integration and shifting population dynamics in multicultural regions.
A Personal Touch in a Digital World
At the core of First Penguin Marriage’s success is Nakayama’s insistence on a personal touch. While most matchmaking services are rooted in algorithms and online platforms, his service emphasizes the combination of traditional Japanese style match making of face-to-face interaction and human connection. Nakayama believes that technology should enhance relationships, not replace the personal aspect of finding love.
“There’s something about sitting down with someone, looking them in the eye, and truly understanding their needs that no app can replicate,” he explains. “Marriage is about the emotional bond between two people, and we’re here to foster that.”
This human-centered approach has already garnered a loyal client base. While Nakayama acknowledges that his business is still young, the feedback has been overwhelmingly positive. Clients appreciate the genuine care and attention they receive, which stands in stark contrast to the impersonal nature of other services.
A Vision for the Future
Looking ahead, Nakayama has ambitious plans for First Penguin Marriage. He envisions expanding his services to reach more diverse populations across Japan and internationally. His hope is that the service will continue to foster meaningful relationships, helping more individuals find lifelong companionship.
As Japan continues to grapple with its societal challenges, Nakayama believes that marriage, as an institution, still has the power to shape the future. By making marriage more inclusive, flexible, and accessible, First Penguin Marriage could play a crucial role in reversing the country’s demographic decline and creating a happier, more connected society.
